January 17, 2006

The Dreaded Surgeon's Appointment

Well, today was the day of the surgeon's appointment...to find out how exactly how bad the right hip is, and to find out exactly what the heck these docs are planning to do to help me. Well...that's what I found out. There may be some medical mumbo jumbo in here, but I will do my BEST to explain! I promise...if you can make it through the next paragraph, it'll all be worth it! : )

My right hip is in the late stage 2, early stage 3 AVN. Which means that it does have significant AVN in the ball of the hip, BUT the ball of the hip is still ROUND. By comparison, my LEFT hip is totally collapsed LATE stage 4...if you looked at an x-ray of it, you would see that the ball of my left hip is NOT rounded...it is bumpy and not smooth. OK...SO...going from that...there is a procedure called a core decompression (CD) that the docs can do IF you "catch" the AVN in the early stages. A CD is where they drill a hole in the hip to stimulate more blood flow. (This is a VERY elementary explanation, so PLEASE, AVN experts, do not get on to me!) The purpose of a CD is to PROLONG the hip replacement (THR) not PREVENT it. I WILL have to have a THR on the right hip eventually, but they are hoping to prolong it as long as they can. CDs in the stages that MY hip is in and later have NOT been known to be the most successful. Meaning...after a few months, the pain returns and I must have a THR anyway. If the CD IS successful, it will give me at the most a few years, hopefully pain free, that I can avoid a THR in that right hip. NOW...for what they told me today.

They want to do a CD on my right hip in the next 6-8 weeks. They think it will be a 50-50 chance that it will be successful. The surgery itself is relatively short and sweet. I would spend a day, MAYBE spend overnight, in the hospital. However, the recovery time for this surgery is daunting. I would have to be COMPLETELY non-weight bearing on my right leg for TWO MONTHS. Well. That poses a problem. My left hip is completely collapsed. I can't possibly hold all of my weight on my left leg seeing as I have my left hip collapsed AND I have AVN in my entire left femur from my hip to my knee. SO...after I have the CD, I will be in a wheelchair for at least 2 months.


After I have completely gotten over the CD surgery, the docs are going to give me what I've been waiting for for well over a year. A ceramic on ceramic total hip replacement on my left hip. IF everything goes perfectly, it should last 25 years before I have to have another one put in. I may have to have revisions but I won't have to have another replacement for 25 years. That's 10 years longer than the metal on metal replacements. And who knows? In 25 years...they may come out with a bionic leg! ; ) We didn't have much discussion on the replacement except for the risks of surgery which are pretty much normal except for one thing. With a hip replacement, you lose a LOT of blood apparantly. Come to think of it, this may NOT be an exception, but he SAID it was an exception and told me that I needed to give blood before the surgery because there are occassions when people need blood transfusions....that was a little scary. But I digress.

My femur. Sadly, there isn't anything at all that they can do for my femur. Doc said that once my hip is replaced, he hopes that the majority of the pain will subside, but unfortunately, I will have pain in that leg for the rest of my life.

Here's where I get overwhelmed. The for the rest of my life part. The other day, I got a bit of a reality check. I realized that I had a "picket fence" outlook on this whole thing. I hadn't let it "hit" me that my right leg was now involved. I hadn't accepted that I'd be dealing with this disease for the REST OF MY LIFE. The words "chronic" always went in one ear and out the other. My very best friend, who also has AVN told me these words which struck me right to the core........."After your hip replacement, you won't be able to put on your own socks for 6 months." And she's right! But I haven't thought that far ahead. I was thinking, after my hip replacement, everything will go back to the way things were. End of story. Nope....this is JUST the beginning. A new chapter. A new freaking NOVEL. (Maybe this is where I should start, huh, Daddy?)

Anyway, that's what happened today. I haven't cried. I haven't thrown myself on the bed in self pity. I haven't raised my hands in the air and screamed "WHY ME?!?!" at the top of my lungs. Maybe that is yet to come. I don't know. That's the key. I don't know what's yet to come. And that scares the hell out of me. But one thing I DO know. I've made some great friends that I wouldn't have made if I hadn't gotten this disease. Some more recently than others. You have been there for me, listened to me, bitched with me, stood up for me, and loved me. You know who you are. ; ) I have a long road ahead of me and I hope and pray with everything left in me that you'll still be with me at the end of that road. To steal a line from one of my new great friends........"I hope you will be my reward!"

Yours, with love to all always!

~*Mare Bear*~