For those of you who haven't been getting my email updates, Mom did NOT have her surgery on Monday. We are the champions of postponed and cancelled surgeries around here. She developed a pretty ugly cough which then turned into a rather bad case of "the crud" the night before her surgery. So, we woke up Monday morning, and not only was MOM really sick, but so was Grandma Lynda. So while Dad was taking Mom to the hospital to get IV antibiotics, I was taking Grandma L to the Urgent Care Clinic to get HER some antibiotics. So for the past week, we've been doctoring the gals and making sure they are rested up because NOW the surgery is rescheduled for THIS Monday. Unless the bird flu or anthrax finds its way into our household. OK...you know what. I really should not be saying things like that. Knowing MY family's luck....... Mom and Grandma L are feeling much better than they did a few days ago. I even caught them out pulling weeds in the yard for a couple of hours yesterday...oh yeah...WELL on their way to recovery.
As for me...I'm doing ok. And by "ok" I mean that I am just mentally putting one foot in front of the other. And I'm managing to do it without breaking something valuable. Several things have gone on personally for me that have been both good and bad lately. And as I don't like to ALL the time get into too much personal stuffs especially if it has to do with someone else...I will just leave it as this.
Yesterday was a special day for me...not many people know why...and to anyone other than myself and a select few...it doesn't matter why. What matters is that it made me think about a lot of things. It made me think of how far I'd come...with a lot of help and love...to believe in myself again. Because several years ago, I was completely empty. I didn't think that another living soul on the planet would ever love me. And I don't mean that I would have one of those "PMS" moments where I'd cry and scream, "NO ONE WILL EVER LOVE ME!!" No...I truly believed it. You see, a long time ago, someone made me believe that. Someone made me believe that I wasn't worth the shit on the bottom of someone's shoe. And it was drilled into my brain so many times and with so much force that I actually started to believe it. I believed that I had nothing to offer. I had zero confidence in myself. I was scared of the world. But then an amazing thing happened. One day...love, belief, confidence, hope, strength and safety found me. Walked right in my door and made me speechless. See, people come into your life for a reason. Six years later and I believe in myself again. I can hope again. I can love again...and most importantly BE loved again. And while life changes and people change and circumstances change...one thing always remains the same....
When someone touches your life, they leave an imprint on your heart. Sometimes that imprint can hurt like a bruise and needs love and caring to heal it...but it always remains. And sometimes...the imprint is that of truth and strength and hope and above all...love. And when the people who leave these kinds of imprints come into your lives, they remain in your heart long after they are gone. It's a cycle of healing and loving and leaving imprints. So, just know that no matter how short of a time you are in a person's life...you are leaving an imprint. Make sure you are leaving the right one. You just may be healing a bruise...you just may be strengthening a spirit...you just may be mending a broken heart...you just may be restoring hope.
Some imprints are deep...all are everlasting...few are genuine and pure love.
